Written Fri, 13th March, 2009
So its D-Day.
Well at least it is for me. Crunch time is around the corner and quite honestly, its getting harder to type as my palms start getting slick with sweat.
That whole, "Men sweat, women glisten" thing. Hogwash. Don't buy it dudes. We sweat alright. Its just that from a young age, its been seared into our cerebral cortex that the importance of investing in a good deodorant and/or anti-pespirant, should never be underrated.
Which is why I never like going to the gym with people. I am not one of those chicks who color co-ordindates yoga outfits to display my buns in the glass displays of a gym while running on a treadmill like a hamster. The perfectly matched, immaculately made up clones freak me out. When I run, i get huffy, puffy, blotchy and quite honestly I definitely look grumpy.
Afterall, my father, whom I've unfortunately inherited my allergy to sports and physical activity from, (its heriditary, naturally) always says, "Have you ever seen a man smiling while running?"
I rest my case.
Getting into a good sweat does feel good of course. From time to time. In between snacks. And during tv commercials to free from sustenance from the fridge. You do hear them calling out to you too don't you?
But right now, I am sweating from my palms. My forehead. I keep shaking my legs. Biting my nails. Not a pretty picture.
Its the match.
Against Man United.
Now I know many of you think it isn't a title race match any longer.
So many spoof articles have been written about how Man United can "lose" the race. That's how unlikely it is at this point.The thing is, even if we have fallen out of contention. Its about pride.
I can understand why Mourinho punched a guy (allegedly), after losing to Manchester United. Nobody wants to lose to them.You know how you can walk around Singapore and guess where some people have studied. AC boys are the easiest to pick out. Kinda like Manchester United fans.
No one wants to give them gloating rights. Especially since they walk around with that strut like they ARE the champions. All the time. (I was just referring to Man Utd fans in this case, so AC boys, please, no threats with knives or bullets and definitely, no mauling.)
This weekend I'll be in the ABU-NBU challenge trailed by my crew from RazorTV. And why would I want to lose to the devils when it means I have to snog 10 of their fans if we lose?
Now, I am hoping at best, for a draw. I am a realist.
Lets take a look at the facts here. United is probably still cruising from the high of defeating Inter. Fergie has a happy, healthy well rested squad that he is spoilt for choice for his lineup. Plus, he has "nice, arrogant" players who are willing to fight to defend their looks even. What more the title?!
And lets take a look at my side. Rafa rotates the squad, trying to do what Fergie does, but he can't, because well, we simply don't have the same depth of players. Where Fergie has said he won't leave, not for a long time. Our team wonders if Rafa will stay on. If our team will be sold. Which players will stay and which will go.
With such uncertainty, how can anyone perform at their best?
Right now, Liverpool's players probably feel like investment bankers.
Yes we thrashed Real, but all 'Pool fans know that usually, after a fantastic win, we kinda tend to fizzle off. Like a virgin boy who sees a naked woman in the flesh for the first time. We need a team that is like Sting.
Not one bopping to the melodic strains of Phil Collins.
That being said, Man U fans, line yourselves up at Clarke Quay this Saturday then boys. Cos I have a feeling I might have to be doing a little kissing.
Sara Ann K