Weird week for pickup lines.

Ok.. So last week, or was it week before.. that I got picked up at the cab stand by a really cute... soon-to-be-divorced man.

But this week.... had a couple of dingers.

BEST PICK-UP LINE SARA HAD THIS WEEK

Context: At a very swish Hermes party, called Men On The Move, which was a super cool installation that took over the whole of the old Kallang Airport. Complete with the most divine food. Very beautiful people. Honestly. Events, hardly get that good. (Kudos to the team behind it btw. Amazing.)

Ok. Now why I am giving this context as well is, these dos are usually rather "insider". Hardly any "picking up" is done because everyone there is who's who. And everyone knows everyone else. In fact, the thing to watch out for most of the time, are the bitchfights. The subtle snubs. And how people who hate each other, handle taking photos together like the best of friends.

So... enter, Venture Capitalist. Smartly dressed. Booming Aussie voice. 30's. Very.. energetic. Like a dude on red bull.

"HI, WE'RE GOING TO BE FRIENDS. WHAT'S YOUR EMAIL?" *proffers phone.

I have to say. I was actually mildly amused, I did give it to him.


THE ONES THAT DID NOT WORK

STILL AT THE HERMES PARTY

"Did I just steal your milk tea?" - mildmannered, well-dressed, but rather handsome guy. Who, wasn't aggressive enough, he got cut off by aforementioned Aussie. Waited around for a while. But... left dejectedly after a while when Aussie guy just dominated.

*sara... looking mildly disappointed that the milk tea got spirited away

"Are you are fan of GOT. You look, very well presented. But you look like you have a kinky side." - description of aforementioned gent shall not be provided in case of incriminating .. err... traits.

*sara... O_O

"Take a photo of me, and you can go downstairs.. and you see that bike on display.. it's mine. Tell them my name, show them the photo, and I bet you they'll let you take it." - mop haired gent.

*sara . . . . . . . and your point is?? .... hmm... okthxbai

OUT OF THE PARTY - and everywhere else

After dinner. Meeting for the first time. After I supposedly met him 5 years ago or something. And speaking with him casually on Facebook for a while.

"Next time we meet, we should be on a holiday together."

*sara. ..... huh?! This was a date?! Ok. I really have been a little out of this dating thing maybe. Geez. How rusty am I at this.


On Facebook.

"Want to come over and cuddle? Seriously. Just cuddle."

*sara ... err... No.

AND...

Well. Just so you know as well, that strange things like that DO HAPPEN TO ME.
ALL THE FRIGGING TIME...

Exhibit 1.

Wed. Apr 30.

Ok. I am also. Not quite sure what this one was about. Really.
Well.
I do.

He just totalled PUA - negged me.
And then brought me up again.

Tsk. Seriously guys. THE GAME?

YOU WANT TO USE THE GAME TACTICS ON ME? The one person in SG who did a full documentary feature serious called Expose' on playa tactics?

err...

Ok.

Moving swiftly on.


Earlier today. Sat. May 3rd. After already, politely ignoring a previous direct message that said "You look familiar.. Where have I seen you before. I want to get to know you more..."

OBVIOUSLY.

Because telling a chick you want to get to know... that she does not exist. And then... tagging her in that photo. ALWAYS WORKS.

Ok. That said. The YOU DO NOT EXIST thing, might have worked on me, if I was Jane/Jain. But I'm not.

OH..

And the follow up...

In direct message.

Seriously.

I don't even get the photo. What's with the barbells... on that cutesy mat. With food on it. FOOD.

AND THE NEXT ONE.

This was DM on twitter. I have a rule. Don't lead people on. But. Be polite. Be nice. Be real. Be you.

Never know when you could make a new friend right?

But... can I just repeat again....

One of the things a journalist HATES the most.. (esp as a line) Variants of... "Why don't you write an article on me."

This guy.. has been trying for... close to a mth. These are the DM's. And btw... what I do. IS ON MY PROFILE. ON TWITTER. WHY ASK ME WHAT I DO?

Only the person's name has been edited out to protect his identity.

NOTE: READ EACH PART, FROM DOWN TO UP FOR CHRONOLOGICAL ORDER.

AND BTW.. the conversation STILL continued... after a tweet I sent out. Saying how much I hated the "write something on me" as a pickup line. But.. ok. Dude is not a bad guy. So.

Part 1. 22 days ago

NOTE: READ EACH PART, FROM DOWN TO UP FOR CHRONOLOGICAL ORDER.

Part 2: At least the first time. He does not ask. Though, dinner is already offered.

NOTE: READ EACH PART, FROM DOWN TO UP FOR CHRONOLOGICAL ORDER.

Part 3: AND THERE IT IS.

NOTE: READ EACH PART, FROM DOWN TO UP FOR CHRONOLOGICAL ORDER.

Part 4. And yet again. He brings up what he does.

Ok.

This is in no way to humiliate or harm or hurt any of the above people featured.

Just.

Gah.

Guys. SERIOUSLY?



Sigh.

I do miss good ole' witty banter and natural chemistry.

But like my good pal MMO said.. "Eh, you know, this is the year that we are both supposed to find our significant other, if we have not already found the person yet."

Uh huh. I do know this babe.

Which is why I am keeping my doors, and my mind, wiiiiide open.



Fate. You have all my attention..

Cos you never know, when you might just have a date with destiny.

So... always have to kiss a few toads to get to the right frog, yes?

*rubbing luckycharm's belly for luck*

=)

*curtsy*

xx
sara